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28 Halloween Costumes That Are Almost Guaranteed To Get You Laid

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Halloween is in nine days, and something tells me you lazy losers still have no idea what you’re going to dress up as. That the case? Yeah, that’s definitely the case.

Lucky for you, I, in my infinite benevolence, have decided to sift through and select 28 of the best costume ideas out there. Sure, I may have faced having special privileges like “lunch” and “free oxygen” taken away from me at the office had I not completed this task, but I was going to do it anyways because I’m such a great guy.

My challenge for you is to come up with better costumes than these. What’s in it for you? If you submit your photo to our 2015 Halloween photo contest, you can win a free spring break trip for you and 3 of your buddies or some Rowdy Gentleman gift cards. Check it out.


Ghillie suit

halloween pic

Your fat pledge brother


The Brazzers film crew


The Founding Fratters


Zach Mettenberger

photo (3)_1-e1383714658894-600x600

Captain Jack Sparrow




Dairy Wine cows


“Because you’re the cup”


Casual squirrels


Mike Ditka squadron


The Eiffel Tower

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