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46 Halloween Costumes That Haven’t Been Made Slutty Yet

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As a kid, Halloween is about getting your squad together and hitting the streets to gather every last piece of candy in your neighborhood, and it was about fun costumes. Something happens to us when we turn 18-ish that takes this fun, innocent holiday from PG-13 to a scandalous NC-17. It’s now a day that girls use as an excuse to let their inner slut come out, and for guys to encourage and enjoy the show. You can’t just dress like a straight up slut, though, because that would make you actually slutty, but for some reason it’s cool to transform traditional costumes into slutty version of themselves.

The problem is so many untraditionally slutty costumes have already been made into slutty ones–slutty nurse, slutty cop, slutty cat, and so on. Try these out. I’m pretty sure they haven’t been used yet.

  1. Slutty Barack Obama.
  2. Slutty colander.
  3. Slutty milkshake.
  4. Slutty Ebola patient.
  5. Slutty ham and cheese sandwich.
  6. Slutty Jameis Winston.
  7. Slutty Mona Lisa.
  8. Slutty grandmother.
  9. Slutty fetus.
  10. Slutty telemarketer.
  11. Slutty try-hard.
  12. Slutty toothpaste.
  13. Slutty toothbrush.
  14. Slutty Pope.
  15. Slutty clipboard.
  16. Slutty Campus Title IX Coordinator.
  17. Slutty Vladimir Putin.
  18. Slutty earthworm.
  19. Slutty janitor.
  20. Slutty top half of a two-person horse costume.
  21. Slutty dinosaur.
  22. Slutty stadium security guard.
  23. Slutty Ebola virus.
  24. Slutty Jesus.
  25. Slutty iPhone 6.
  26. Slutty iPhone 6 Plus.
  27. Slutty offensive coordinator.
  28. Slutty guidance counselor.
  29. Slutty candelabra.
  30. Slutty gamer nerd.
  31. Slutty textbook.
  32. Slutty Bobby Shmurda.
  33. Slutty pot roast.
  34. Slutty bowl of queso.
  35. Slutty guacamole.
  36. Slutty hashtag.
  37. Slutty crab legs.
  38. Slutty Coach Spurrier visor.
  39. Slutty mittens.
  40. Slutty sweater vest.
  41. Slutty pumpkin spice latte.
  42. Slutty barista.
  43. Slutty Sperrys.
  44. Slutty Mario.
  45. Slutty Luigi.
  46. Slutty Ruger Dern.

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Dillon Cheverere

Dillon Cheverere (@DCheverere) is the Vice President of Media for Grandex, Inc. He's a native Texan with a full head of hair and knows his way around a nice box of red wine. Dorn graduated (BBA) with a GPA sitting in the meaty part of the bell curve, not lagging behind, but not trying to show off, either. Golf is his game now. He's long off the tee but can't putt for shit. Email: dillon@grandex.co

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