NEW TFM Videos Section

Watch thousands of hilarious videos from college campuses across the country.

Watch Now

2013 Wife Mock Draft

======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====

Hannah Weinberg


School: University of Maryland
House: Top-tier smart house
Major: Business Administration
GPA: 3.8
Hair color: Brunette
Height: 5-6
Weight: 119 lbs.


-Highly regarded in Panhellic community, held exec positions for two years.
-Been called a “tomcat” by several ex-boyfriends.
-Runway model legs.
-Comes from money. Father owns houses in Breckenridge, Captiva Island and Scottsdale.
-Strong character, high integrity. Has never cheated on a boyfriend, even in high school.


-Career-first woman. May not be a “team player” when it comes to child-bearing.
-Her father demands her spouse also be Jewish. Conversion may be in the cards.
-Considering business school in London.

Projected: Late 1st/Early 2nd

Outlook: Could prove to be good value, considering. Potential cornerstone piece for any partner. Medium bust potential, divorce could be a factor. Possible fall-back option in free agency once first round of divorcees hit the open market next decade.

Email this to a friend


The Champions Tour is a writer for Total Frat Move and Post Grad Problems. If you don't know who he is, just ask your older sister about him.

90 Comments You must log in to comment, or create an account
Show Comments

Download Our App

Take TFM with you. Get

The Feed