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20. They try way too hard to impress you.
19. They think they know how to rage because they pounded Smirnoff Ice in high school.
18. The kid that shows up decked out in clothes from Hot Topic on day one, and then hits the Polo outlet.
17. They think hazing is something made up for the movies, and that you’ll be best friends forever.
16. They have stupid fucking haircuts.
15. They have googled your fraternity and casually drop in facts about the founding fathers that they have no business knowing.
14. The kid that won’t shut the fuck up about how he played shortstop in high school.
13. They have zero alcohol tolerance.
12. They ask to bum your cigarettes and dip, and you’re not supposed to say no.
11. The two kids who get shit-hammered and kick off a lifetime bromance by saying things like, “Bro we’re going to slam so much ass in this fucking frat for the rest of college!”
10. They talk shit about other fraternities in a pathetic attempt at impressing you.
9. The kid who starts referring to the fraternity in the “we” form way too early. “We are totally going to dominate intramural football this year, broseph!”
8. The kid that has a 0% chance of getting a bid that’s drinking your beer.
7. They have no idea how to talk to girls, and are incredibly creepy.
6. They overuse the word “frat” like it will cease to exist if they don’t casually drop it every ten seconds. “Fuck yeah this sandwich is frat!”
5. They desperately try to copy your wardrobe while mixing in elements of high school attire such as flat bill hats or skater shoes.
4. You get fined for telling them to shut the fuck up and go get you another beer.
3. 95% of them are complete losers.
2. They complain about their “GDI roommates” and rip on “geeds” when they are still GDIs themselves.
1. They’re drinking your beer and trying to fuck your girls when they should be mopping your floors and trying to earn your respect.